Last week, containing the day in which Momma was born.

I did not post this last week, mostly because I'm insane and must've lost my damn mind.

Last week contained Momma's birthday, and if you didn't wish her a happy birthday then by God you oughta be ashamed of yourself.

I would like to take this moment to address some things about my momma.

1. She is the best.
2. That is all.

I have friends who talk to their mom's every once in a while and whose mom's don't even really know who they are or what they do or that today they are wearing the same jeans as the past 5 day's because she's scared that if she washes them that they won't fit.

That's too bad. I talk to momma every day (so does Morgan) and if I haven't called her until well into the afternoon then I get a phone call from her saying, "Why you no calla?" I always talk to her before I go to bed, and sometimes she calls me first thing in the morning...much to my chagrin. (I've always wanted to say that...did I sound like a pompous ass? Thought so.)

I can tell her anything and everything, and I do. Of course as a teenager we weren't this close, you know because I was an asshole (her words), but I think deep down we always were. All of the things she taught me about right and wrong and how doing any drug will immediately kill me or render me a vegetable so that I will serve as an example to everyone else, have stuck with me. Hell, just last week I had a migraine and she gave me a percocet and I was so scared of just that, so I only took half. Then she laughed and I let her know that it was all her fault.

I call her when I need advice on anything and she's always happy to help. She saves my life everyday. She taught Madison about fairies and creatures. She taught me...everything. Common sense and manners. Two things that seem to not get taught these days. I say "Yes ma'am and No ma'am" to this day as does Madison and as will Cooper. If I forget to use manners, then she responds with, "You're never too old for me whoop your ass." To which I respond, "Yes ma'am." While covering my rear, out of habit.

We communicate on a whole separate level, this level is sometimes referred to as "crazy". She can say, "Go get me that thing, over there on the deal." And I will retrieve it. At one point in my life she started calling me "cock"...she started that little trend while we where in the grocery store...and she yelled it. And I responded. She once sang Happy Birthday to a stranger in Wal-Mart. I learned to just give up on being embarassed by anything, ever.

I feel like this post isn't even doing her justice, I'm just letting you know all of these great things about her but you'll never really know how amazing she is.

The sound of her voice can make me cry and I couldn't get by without her. Thank you momma for being...you.

She will kill me and then whoop me if I put a picture of her on here...so here is one of her offspring.

Which includes me.

There I am.

And there is Morgan.

And we are cute.