Happy Halloween

Well, now it's November, so Happy November! How was your Halloween? Was it everything you dreamed and hoped for?

Did your Leg Avenue costume come in the mail on time? Sorry. That was harsh.

When I see those costumes I actually cringe. Is there no imagination left in the world? I wouldn't mind if it was a sexy moon fairy costume if at least it had been put together piece by piece and didn't come out of a bag. A whore bag. Oops. Sorry again.

I was Flo. The Progressive Insurance Lady. I had to clarify because someone mistook me for Flo from that show Alice.

Guy: Oh, I thought you were Flo from that show…what was it, from the 70s?


Me: Alice?

Guy: That show with the waitress, Alice and the diner…

Me: ALICE!?

Guy: Yeah, Alice. I thought you were Flo, from that show.

Me: IT’S QUITE OBVIOUS THAT I’M FLO FROM THE PROGRESSIVE INSURANCE COMMERCIALS. QUITE. OBVIOUS.

Momma: Ooh. Indignant.

Yes.

No.

This coming from a man in no costume. Thanks for showing up and bringing your 'A' game, dude.

Who Do I Look Like?

After not so much searching we found Madison a halloween costume. She wants to be a vampire. I just took the easy way out and bought the "costume-in-a-bag" version. Give me a break, I'm making a person here!

Amazingly enough we got it home and it didn't hang off her limbs like a trash sack, it actually fit, it didn't drag the floor either. Like I said, amazing. So, it's a vampire costume. Black dress, long red hangy things from the sleeves, a weird dracula collar that sticks up all around. You get the picture, vampire. Vampire.

Madison: (dancing in circles) Who do I look like?

Me: Um, a vampire.

Madison: No, now, like with this on like this. Who do I look like?

Me: Vampire?

Madison: With the collar down like this. (dancing side to side now) Who do I look like?

Me: (searching for whatever the hell the right answer is so that this back and forth can cease) Princess?

Madison: Which one?

Me: Oh my God. Snow White? (praying that this is the correct answer)

Madison: (dancing, humming)

She never did confirm if I was correct. Either way, vampire.

Right?