Accidental Thievery

Years ago, about 8 years...I think, I don't know. Whenever it was, I think Morgan was in middle school. We lived in a really nice neighborhood and he would often bike to the local grocery store.

One day he returned from the grocery store with a bike that wasn't his own.

Morgan: "You won't believe what happened!"

Me: "What?"

Morgan: "Someone STOLE my bike and left my theirs!!"

Me: "sigh"

Morgan: "Isn't that insane?! What assholes!!"

Me: "Morgan. Let me get this straight. You left your bike on the rack, went into the store, came back out and your bike was gone but this one was in its place?"

Morgan: "...  ...  ...yeeeeeessssss."

Me: "Morgan. You just stole someone's bike."

Morgan: "No....no...wait...no. Oh no."

He kept it.

And this is where I tell you of our fear that we have somehow committed a crime and don't know it. Both of us have this fear. Whenever we see a cop we think, "Oh God. Did I rob a bank and not know it? Did I shoplift and not realize it? Did I murder someone by accident and not even KNOW!?" "How am I going to prove my innoncence when I don't even know what happened!?" "Where was I yesterday?" "Where was I today, oh God. I've killed someone haven't I? Jesus."

And that was a peek into my brain. I hope you survived.

We think the exact same things.

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I love it when you say things to me that reinforce me positively. So...carry on then, do that thing. Lastly, capital hat!