Guest Post!

Well hello there! I hope each of you had a lovely Christmas, Hannukkah, Boxing Day, Kwanzaa, and whatever else falls into the holiday category. I had a lovely Christmas as did my family.

This morning my fabulous friend sent a story about her morning to my email. I read it and immediately wanted to share it with you...1. because it was funny and I'm sure you can relate, b. because I'm lazy today and don't want to right anything substantial, which I'm also sure you can relate to. (I have put a few notes into the story, you'll notice them because they will be in red font.)

You're welcome.

Stephanie's story starts......now!

So you know how some customer service people have that kind of irritating sense of humor, where they say the opposite of what you say then think it's really funny. (these people are called sociopaths)

I hate those people. It is their fault my coffee was disgusting this morning:

I drive out of my way to Kaladi this morning because the coffee shop downstairs is closed this week, and I need espresso to get through the day. So I order my coffee, "Grande half-caramel latte" (like a boss). Cashier responds "Half-caf latte?" I say "No. A half a shot of caramel, full caffeine please." She responds, "oh, extra caramel latte" (what the hell is wrong with this person?)

I stare at her blankly. Thinking she is one of those idiots at the beginning of this story. Like, I'm going to say "no. not extra. THE OPPOSITE OF EXTRA. HAaaaLF." And then she'll say "hahahahah I know I'm just joshin' ya" at which point I feel like an ass. Every time. Gah. (people that say "joshin'" are psychopaths...great, she's a socio-psychopath)

Meanwhile, the actual barista goes, "I got it" and takes the cup before I can decide whether to say HALF again or do that awkward laugh. I think, naw, she saw the whole thing go down and heard me order twice. I'm good.

"Extra caramel latte!" Stares into my eyes. It was disgusting. (Stephanie, did your nemesis call ahead and tell them you were coming so that they could totally ruin your morning? Look into this.)

Here's the thing. She heard me say half. Otherwise how would she have responded "half-caf". How did she get to "extra" HOW!?!? (in other planets "half" means "extra", she's from Jupiter obviously)

I wish I would have actually lit my $4.00 on fire. That would have been a better experience.

Clearly, socio-psychopath.

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I love it when you say things to me that reinforce me positively. So...carry on then, do that thing. Lastly, capital hat!