I'll Be Gumming My Dinner In No Time

One of my fears is that my teeth will one day fall out. I'll just open my mouth they will fall out and make plinking noises like piano keys. I sometimes have dreams about it and I wake up and systematically check each tooth by trying to wiggle them. I'm sure that I'm not helping things by wiggling each tooth. I've probably done it enought that eventually I will just wiggle them all out. I'm my own worst enemy.

I recently learned that having dreams about your teeth falling out means financial stress. Well, I have plenty of that and I'm sure the stress is what's going to make my teeth fall out.

Last night while flossing I came to a point where one tooth shot a searing white-hot pain into my brain. I tested it to make sure and sure enough, it hurt so bad I couldn't bear to floss in that location. So of course I did what anyone else would do. I brushed again, used my Water-Pik filled with water and Listerine, then brushed again using the "I'm not fucking around" brush head, then I stared at the ceiling all night wondering if I'd have any teeth left in the morning.

Did I call the dentist? No.

(I'm not inserting my usual picture of something related to my story here because the thought of looking up anything regarding teeth falling out already has me grossed out enough. So please enjoy this cute kitty.)