The Day Where My Secrets Are Strewn About
I'm sure that at this very moment she is repeating every word that I have said in the past 3 days verbatim and she is revealing all of my deep dark secrets. Like the fact that I haven't done dishes this week, that I scream at the TV when "for eff's sake how many freaking commercials are there!", that half of my bed is covered in clean laundry that I haven't felt like folding, that two night this week she had a bologna sandwich for dinner because I hadn't been to the grocery store yet, that if I'm in the bathroom look at myself in the mirror for too long I start to cry and then I eat a donut...you know the basics.
So, if later on today you find that you have no words to speak, no topics to talk about, just nothing to say, it's because she has used it all up. She has said every word and now you will live in silence.
And, you're welcome.