5.21.2010

The Day Where My Secrets Are Strewn About

The last day of school was yesterday. Doesn't mean anything for me since I'm a grown up and last time I checked we don't get out of work for the summer. Right? I am right, right? Because if I'm wrong please someone tell me now. That's what I thought. Damn.

Summer vacation means that Madison is free to roam the world again. She's thinking of biking through Europe, heading down to Graceland or visiting that damn pineapple under the sea. I immediately cancelled all of her travel plans and set her up to go to my friend who is also my sitter's house with the Coop. Why? Because I'm the devil that's why.

As soon as we walk into the house to drop them off Madison starts talking. To who? Anyone that will listen. What's she talking about? Everything. All of it. When I was leaving she was still talking.

I'm sure that at this very moment she is repeating every word that I have said in the past 3 days verbatim and she is revealing all of my deep dark secrets. Like the fact that I haven't done dishes this week, that I scream at the TV when "for eff's sake how many freaking commercials are there!", that half of my bed is covered in clean laundry that I haven't felt like folding, that two night this week she had a bologna sandwich for dinner because I hadn't been to the grocery store yet, that if I'm in the bathroom look at myself in the mirror for too long I start to cry and then I eat a donut...you know the basics.

So, if later on today you find that you have no words to speak, no topics to talk about, just nothing to say, it's because she has used it all up. She has said every word and now you will live in silence.

And, you're welcome.


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I love it when you say things to me that reinforce me positively. So...carry on then, do that thing. Lastly, capital hat!