My Cruise Control Is Psychotic and Manipulative

Whenever I'm on the highway and decide that now is a good time to employ my fancy cruise control, that is the moment that the car in front of me adjusts their speed...when I say adjusts their speed, I mean, they slam of their brakes.

I think that my car's cruise control may submit some sort of signal to other cars that says, "Hey, she just went to the trouble of setting her cruise control to the exact speed that she has been going for the past 5 miles, the speed that also matches yours. Since you have been driving this speed for so long with no waiver, she has assumed that you will continue this system of steady speed. So, why don't you go ahead and slow the fuck down."


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I love it when you say things to me that reinforce me positively. So...carry on then, do that thing. Lastly, capital hat!